Some Like It Hot
by Bunny on the Moon
Summary: ONESHOT, Yami no Yuugi x Malik. And then some like it VERY hot.


ONE-SHOT. Yami/Malik. Rated for shounen-ai, slight language, references to sex.

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**Some Like It Hot  
30 Kisses Challenge, Them #03 - jolt!**

"Ra, Malik... how in the hell can you _eat_ that stuff?"

Malik paused at his companion's question, salsa-laden chip hovering only inches from his mouth. "Stick it in my mouth and chew?" That said, he popped the chip in to further emphasize his point.

Yami raised an eyebrow at the blonde's sarcastic response. "That's not what I meant." When the other male quirked an eyebrow of his own, matching his expression, Yami sighed exasperatedly and continued. "How do you manage to put up with that... _heat_?"

Lavender eyes flitted downward, from the bowl of chunky red salsa sitting on the table in front of him, to the open bag of tortilla chips next to it. Malik shrugged, reaching into the bag and plucking out another chip. "I like hot food, so sue me." He ate the chip after giving it a thorough salsa-bath.

The former pharaoh blinked as he watched Malik continue to eat his snack. He then looked down at the bowl of salsa. Oh, sure, it _looked_ innocent enough in its chunky red glory, but taking into account that the blonde had gone through at least five glasses of water in the last few minutes proved that it was anything _but_ innocent. Then again, Malik was from Egypt; they'd probably had a considerable amount of spicy food there. Hot food to go with a hot climate, right? Even so, it was strange - salsa's origins laid in Spain or Mexico, nowhere _near_ Egypt. Or Japan, for that matter.

Malik blinked at his friend. Yami was glaring down _a bowl of salsa_. He popped another chip into his mouth, a sly grin spreading across his lips. "Mmmm," he purred, "it's good. Why don't you try some?"

Now it was Yami's turn to blink. He scrunched up his nose at the Egyptian's offer, and then promptly scoffed. "Thanks, but no thanks." It wasn't as if he _himself_ didn't want to try it, but if it ended up giving him heartburn, then the one he shared his soul with would be feeling it instead of him. He doubted that Yuugi would like something like that, so he declined.

Malik pouted. "Not even a little taste? It's not that hot, I swear."

"Malik Ishtar, you've drank about six glasses of water since you've started eating that. I think our definitions of 'not that hot' may differ _just a little_," Yami said, taking his partner's stomach into consideration again.

"Yes, and water does jack shit to cool it off, but you don't see me sitting here sweating like I just got done having sex, do you?" Malik deadpanned, eating another salsa-covered chip.

Yami couldn't fight off the intense blush that flooded across his face with that statement, and he was sure he looked about as red as the topic of conversation. "M-Malik..."

Malik found his friend's reaction to be hilarious and started chuckling to himself, his shoulders convulsing slightly as he did so. "Man, the look on your face..."

When the holder of the Puzzle finally found his voice, he shot a glare at the laughing teen. "That's not funny, Malik, and you know it."

His only response was the consumption of yet another chip.

Eyebrow raise.

Chip.

Exasperated groan.

"...you know, if you're so scared of giving your midget-of-an-other-self indigestion or something, there is another way you can see how hot this is," Malik said after several moments of silence.

Although Yami's curiosity was piqued, he wasn't entirely sure if he _wanted_ to know what this alternate method was. Malik's nonchalant tone of voice _seemed_ innocent enough; he sensed no hidden undertones within it. Though, knowing Malik, it was probably something that would make one - or both - of them feel rather... _awkward_.

He looked from his friend's face, to the bowl of salsa, and back again. Looked at the bowl. Saw chunky red death. Looked at Malik. Saw casual indifference. Yami sighed again, defeated. "Alright, Malik. What is it?"

When he saw the impish smirk spread across Malik's lips, the former pharaoh instantly regretted his decision.

One more chip followed the smirk, and the blonde stood up, crossing over to where Yami was sitting. The smaller male blinked up at Malik as his chin was lifted up towards him; he raised an eyebrow in curiosity. "Malik, what are you--" Yami was cut off by the other male's lips upon his own, and he tensed up slightly. Moments later, he relaxed and allowed his eyes to slide shut, thoughts of the salsa completely leaving his mind.

Malik gently nipped at Yami's bottom lip before running the tip of his tongue along the seam of the other's mouth. Yami obliged by granting entrance to the Egyptian, his own tongue meeting Malik's with equal fervor. He tentatively reached up and cupped the sides of Malik's face, eliciting a soft moan from the other male. Malik brought his hands up to tangle in the spiky strands at the base of Yami's neck, effectively deepening the kiss.

Yami was sure that he felt the heat rise to his face; he had good reason to - one, this was _Malik_, the visual embodiment of sex, that he was kissing here, and two... Yami had long since forgotten what number two was. Oh well, it probably wasn't that important anyway.

Malik pulled away after a few moments, leaving Yami in a somewhat dazed condition. The holder of the Puzzle felt a pleasant tingling sensation in his mouth, but was jolted back into reality by a tingling of a completely different variety.

Yami's eyes widened as that small tingling turned into an insufferable heat, and he felt sweat dotting his brow as he cupped his hand over his mouth. "_Ra, Malik!_" he shrilled, shooting a glare at the culprit. "You said it wasn't that hot!" He swallowed several times in a mad attempt to rid himself of the searing heat. If the salsa tasted that hot just from _indirectly_ tasting it, Yami couldn't even fathom how hot it could possibly be, were he to actually _eat_ it.

The blonde shrugged and grinned innocently, reaching for his glass of water and handing it to his friend. "Hey, in your own words - our definitions of 'not that hot' vary just a bit." He stuck his tongue out at the former pharaoh, earning a smack upside the head. Malik snickered to himself and rubbed the top as his head as he watched Yami down almost the entire glass in about two seconds.

"The next time you want to do that, please, for the love of all that is holy, _eat something that won't kill off Aibou's taste buds!_" Yami squalled, not fully comprehending what he was saying. Realizing that the water wasn't helping a bit, he reached into the glass and plucked out an ice cube, grudgingly popping it into his mouth. The constant chill of the cube did little more than numb his senses to the heat, but it was better than sitting through it.

Malik raised an eyebrow in amusement. Had Yami just implied that he wouldn't _mind_ kissing him again? He decided to take the idea and run with it, just to see his friend's reaction. "Okay, next time I'll eat ice cream. How does that sound?"

Yami frowned indignantly, the burning feeling on his tongue finally ebbing away. "That's fine," he huffed around the melting ice cube, but then he felt his face heat up again as he realized what he'd just said. "Er, I mean..." he stammered. His crimson eyes met Malik's lavender, and found an indeterminable emotion within their depths, and his expression softened. "...yes, that... that's fine."

The blonde simply grinned and sat back down in front of his salsa bowl.

- _owari_ -

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-rolls eyes- Honestly, only _I'd_ get a plotbunny while eating chips and salsa... 


End file.
